Dungeons of Darkness

“RUN FASTER, PEWDIE!” Stephan shouted as the barrel thundered its way towards our heroes.

The corridor showed no signs of coming to an end, which is both a good and bad thing. If it did come to an end, Pewdie would be trapped, and the barrel would surely run over him. He ran and ran and ran, until he heard a crunch from behind.

“Pewdie, look!” Stephano cried.

He turned around, and the giant barrel had become wedged between the short ceiling and the floor.

“Heh, heh, heh…” the barrel chuckled in a low, evil voice. “You’ll never get to Marzia, Pewdie. Every single ghost, sprite, spirit, and entity you have encountered in the past will be waiting for you. You’ll never make it, and when you are erased from history, Marzia will become one of us! Then NOTHING will stand in our way for our quest in world domination! ”

Pewdie’s eyes widened. If he didn’t get to Marzia soon, then not only would he lose his girlfriend, but the world, as we know it, would succumb to the Barrel’s onslaught.

“Pewdie,” Stephano said calmly. “You have to carry on. Chuck a rock at this facking barrel, if it makes you feel any better. We can’t just stay here, being pussies.”

“But Stephano,” Pewdie began. “This goddam barrel is blocking the way. Where do we go?”

“Aye caramba, there’s a door right behind us, you retard.”

Pewdie turned around, and indeed, there was a door right behind him. He approached the door and opened it.

When the duo entered the room behind the door, they were greeted by a small, wooden table. On top of the table, was a miner’s lamp with three full jars of oil to its side, and four vials of a green substance. On each of the four vials, was a piece of paper that said: Laudanum.

“Ooh, Laudanadabadananum!” Pewdie said happily. Underneath the lantern, was a letter written neatly with ink. It said this:

Dear Felix,

I am very lonely here. The barrels are such assholes; they’re even bigger jerks to their minions. I have sent Mr. Chair’s nephew, Mayonnaise, to deliver this collection of helpful supplies to you. You are going to need these supplies, since the Barrels have hired creatures more nasty then the Bros.

I love you, and good luck!

P.S: Brofist!

Cutiepiemarzia

“You better hurry, Mr. Pewdie!” Mayonnaise, the table that held the supplies, said excitedly. “Marzia misses you terribly.”

“Wait a sec, Mayo.” Pewdie replied. “How’d you get past the…?”

“I used CHAIRMODE! You should, too! My uncle taught me it’s very important while exploring the castle.”

“Thank you, young Mayo.” Stephano said. “You’ve done a fine job. Tell your uncle I said, ‘Ellos, and tell Piggeh, if he’s still doing that damned slide, that I said he’s a goddamn psychopath.”

“Okay! When I grow up, I wanna be just like YOU guys! Goodbye, and don’t forget to use chairmode!”

With that, the little table skittered away. Pewdie loaded his lamp up with oil and exited the room. He came across a rusty, iron door with a sign that said: Dungeons

Pewdie took a deep breath, and opened the iron door.

The room was big. The walls were wide and tall. Pewdie and Stephano gaped in horror, because a bunch of knight suits constricting into a thin pathway were in front of them. There was no other way to go but foreword.

“Stephano, I don’t trust these people.” Pewdie said with fright.

“I know you don’t, Pewdie.” Stephano replied. “Better start untrusting them.”

Pewdie then ran up to one of the statues and untrusted it. Before he could lay a finger on the next one, a giant knight helmet appeared in front of him and screamed in German:

“HALLO FREUNDE!!”

Pewdie gasped harshly, and fell to the ground. He looked up, and the giant helmet was gone.

“THAT’S WHY I DON’T TRUST YOU!! RAWBARAWBARAWBARAW!!!” he raged, going up to all of the armor suits and brofisting their helmets off.

He then exited the room and came upon a corridor lit faintly by torches.

“Corridors, I don’t like corridors.” he said in a low voice.

No sooner had he stopped talking when a heavy, harsh demon voice from the right said:

“Hey, there!”

Pewdie looked to the right, and there was an empty, dark room that contained a Bro. it lurched out of the darkness and chased him. He screamed and ran. He came across another room to his side that had a Bro in it. It too, got out and chased him. Pewdie kept running, until he saw a door at the end of the corridor. He looked back, and shrieked in pure terror. There, completely filling the corridor, was a whole plethora of Bros, and they were running directly at him. He sprinted towards the door at the end, and dropped Stephano by accident as he opened the door.

“No!! STEPHANO!!!” Pewdie cried to his friend.

“GO PEWDIE! RUUUN! SAVE YOURSELF!!” Stephano shouted to him as he closed the door.

“Ah man, Stephano…” Pewdie said, sadly.

He heard a growl coming from behind. He turned around and there, in the middle of the room, was a Bro…